Versions of Me
You may have noticed I haven’t posted in a while. The easiest, most predictable answer for that is: I’ve been busy. I’m juggling a lot of stuff and a few balls dropped
But underneath those generalizations, the more specific truth is I sold a manuscript recently. At this point in time I can’t tell you the title. I can’t tell you who the publisher is. I can’t tell you what it’s about, where it’s set or when it will be released. Basically I can tell you zip, zero, nada.
Except for one thing: this book is very, very different from anything I’ve written before. So different it hovers at the outer edge of professional evolution and taps at the door of career-reinvention.
And that is one reason why my publisher asked me to use a pseudonym.
There is a long, hallowed tradition of authors using pseudonyms when switching genres. When Nora Roberts wants to write about crime instead of romance she writes under J.D. Robb. When Anne Rice took brief respites from the world of vampires, witches and historical literature to write erotic fiction she did so under the pen names A. N. Roquelaure and Anne Rampling.
I’ve said it here before: If you want to be a one-click-author (meaning readers will preorder your book before they see a cover or description) you must deliver the same emotional experience with every single book. If you’re not going to do that then often the smartest approach is to use a pen name. That way you won’t disappoint readers who were looking for flowers and romance with a book about hardboiled detectives or startle vampire-fans with a novel about BDSM (although one could argue that every vampire story does touch on each word represented in the BDSM acronym…but that’s another discussion).
Still, I had mixed feelings about the request. I’m very proud of this new book, I named the protagonist after a family member. I wanted to put my real name on it.
Also, on the face of it, restarting my career with a pen name means all my previous accomplishments add up to nothing. For the readers, critics and booksellers of this new project, my other works would not exist. They would simply be erased. That hurt.
But then I sat with it for awhile and came to realize that wasn’t really true. No matter how concealed my identity is my accomplishments still mean something. I’ve learned from them. I’ve grown as a writer because of what I’ve written before. This new work reflects that even if the pubic doesn’t know it. And maybe this book deserves the chance to stand on its own and be judged on its own merits without the burden of being compared to my others.
There are also pseudonyms I can use that will mean nothing to the vast majority of the world but will mean a lot to my family.
Plus my new superhero persona can’t hold up forever because my publisher wants to feature an author photo. Yes, Diana Prince was able to fool everyone by simply Wonder-Twirling out of her Brooks-Brothers-ensemble and into a star-spangled-one-piece . But I am not Diana Prince. I’m definitely not Wonder Woman. There is no fashion make-over that will make me unidentifiable to a basic Google image search.
And lastly, playing pretend has always been my thing. That’s why I still love Halloween.
So I accepted the terms.I picked a new name, snagged the social media handles and domain names attached to it, started strategizing with a web designer in regards to creating a site for this new identity, bought a wig for a new author photo (to at least throw people off for the short-term) and contemplated what it would mean to reimagine myself at this stage in my life and career.
I also I started to neglect all things associated with Kyra-Davis-the-author. I neglected Kyra Davis social media, the Kyra Davis website, requests for Kyra Davis to appear in festivals and conventions and yes, I neglected the Kyra Davis Substack.
You can be Diana Prince, or you can be Wonder Woman. But even a superhero can’t be both things at the same time.
And then my editor emailed to inform me the sales team had had themselves a rethink.
For a variety of reasons they decided playing pretend wasn’t the way to go. They no longer want me to transform into someone else. They want Kyra.
My agent was thrilled.
My husband was thrilled.
I was circumspect.
In the space of one email my dreams of doing a warp-speed twirl that would take me from Perfectly-Capable-Human to Amazonian-Superhero vanished faster than Wonder Woman’s invisible plane.
I went through a real journey to get to a place in which I could fully embrace taking on a pseudonym. Now I would have to essentially retrace my steps, follow the breadcrumbs back to wanting to use my own name. The whole thing felt a little like a metaphor, like maybe at my age there really aren’t any new beginnings to be had. I know, I know, that’s silly…but that thought…or at least the feeling that goes with that thought came up for me.
And yet the truth is there is no name that better represents me than the one I’ve already got. And while I’m not exactly the same Kyra Davis I was when I started my writing career I’m not entirely different either. I have to assume the same’s true for my readers. There will be some, perhaps many, who will find that unlike my Sophie mysteries and/or my romances, this upcoming book isn’t thier thing. But some of my old readers, as well as bunches of new ones, will find that this book speaks to the person they are now.
It definitely speaks to the person I am now:
Kyra Davis, the author that’s been and the author that’s just begun